Rest & Create

As this year began and I was coming out of a season of busy where pretty much every minute had something assigned to it and there wasn't much margin for error I was so excited for the breathing room of giving space to my dreams. My words for this season are "rest" and "create." I want to be intentional about setting aside time to just rest. This doesn't mean excess sleep for me these days.... sometimes when you have a baby who is up sick all night and you finally fall asleep at 6:00 a.m. only to be woken up by the needs of your other two at 8:00 a.m. you can either stress over lack of sleep and the fact that you are exhausted or you can remember that your word is rest, and so after breakfast is made you leave the dishes, you put on a movie, and you get cozy in blankets with your babes and snuggle together until almost lunch time. This is rest for me.

And then sometimes you carve out space for rest and it looks like going into the basement, finding your leftover gallon and a half of gray paint and a paint brush and starting to paint your kitchen like you've wanted to do for years. And the painting takes you five days at a relaxed pace (and the stairwell still isn't done but that's ok because you're looking at the progress instead of what's left to do still) and you realize that giving yourself permission to rest awakens energy and creativity and sometimes you get more done than you would have if you were pushing yourself. Turns out creating is also rest for me.

So far resting has been such an amazing paradox. It is finding what makes my soul come alive and simply responding to it. It is leaving my calendar somewhat clear, not scheduling every second, and it feels like space to breathe. It is refreshing and energizing. Sometimes it looks like not worrying about what time I have to wake up, actually watching a movie and staying up until midnight (last night!) and sometimes it looks like staying on my routine to the letter, keeping all the dishes washed, the laundry done, the house picked up... It is extending grace and giving myself permission to fully live in the things that awaken my passion. Energy and fulfillment are by-products of living a life of passion. Deadlines, un-flexible schedules, and graceless-ness are passion killers for me. Not that deadlines and structure are bad things, but I can't look too far ahead or I get overwhelmed. And so as we begin this year those two words, rest and create, have guided many of my goals.

As we approached this year while I was still in my season of busy I would jokingly say that I was going to sleep the month of january, clean my house the month of february, and spend as much time with the Lord and my boys as possible, and beyond that I had no idea. Shaun and I had a really fun conversation one evening about our goals in our relationship with each other and as a family. It's been fun refining and categorizing the things I hope to do, the changes I hope to make.

Here's my rough list of goals for this year. There are more, but these are the basics.

Spiritual

Bible Study
chronological Bible reading
be optimistic, express gratitude at every opportunity

Marriage

Monthly Date Night

Continue to keep myself vulnerable
serve Shaun without expectation, out of genuine love

Family

Dinner time (boys stay at table til we're all done, talk about our days, ask to be excused, take their dishes to the sink)

Devotional time all together before bed

teach my kids the fruit of the spirit
give the boys jobs that teach them how to serve each other and our family

House

Kitchen Cabinets & walls
gallery wall in family room
paint basement office
continue progress in master bedroom
purge/re-organize/take care of what we already have
keep working toward our "dream" 

Photography

create a website 

Physical 

give running a try (starting in march)
better posture

So many of these things I have already started, some I have even finished, some I am intimidated by, some I haven't begun yet at all, but I know that I want to continue to grow as a person, and something that seems hard just because I've never done it before I might look back on someday and think it was easy. The best way to stretch yourself beyond where you are at is to do something you think is impossible or crazy. Then when you go back to normal life it suddenly seems much easier than before. 

Worth the Wait

When we moved into our home in October of 2010, I thought there was only one thing I wanted to buy  for our new house. It was matching bedside wall mounted lamps from pottery barn. Then we moved in and I realized there were a lot of things I never even thought of that were going to take priority over the lamps. Like a trash can. Like kitchen stools. Like re-painting the basement and finding family room furniture... like a picnic table for our back porch... like a new dining table because our other one was beginning to fall apart... (we didn't get all those things at once, but over the past four years they have slowly been purchased/found/added...) 

Well about 8 or so months ago I found one of the lamps with the exact finish and shade I wanted at the pottery barn outlet for a fraction of the price. I grabbed it up right away, and we installed it on Shaun's side of the bed. Then I had my name added to a waiting list should they get another of the same lamp. And I waited. And waited. And occasionally stopped in and looked for myself... But never did find another of the same. Just a little over a week ago I used a pottery barn gift card from Christmas and went ahead and purchased a second lamp. It came in the mail two days ago and I ran to my sister-in-laws to borrow her drill and Shaun hung it up for me that very night. (While we had the drill we fixed some other things in our bedroom, which led to me learning to spackle, and sand, and repaint, which made me feel all handy and perfectionistic, which of course I am not really either, but it was a good feeling nonetheless... I digress....) 

I have other plans for what will soon be hanging over our bed, but if you wait til it's "finished" (which it never is, for me at least) then you'll never show it, so here it is in it's current, beautiful, two-matching-lamps-on-the-wall state!! 

My favorite thing about the lamps is that the bar can slide up and down, swivel left to right, and the lamp shade can be adjusted to different angles. It definitely feels luxurious, and super cozy at night. Below, Shaun's side of the bed on the left, mine on the right.  

The three little frames on my table are all from homegoods. I don't have photos in them yet, but I'm excited to choose some favorites of Shaun and I to fill them. 

 And the other luxurious addition to our bedroom is this faux fur sheepskin on the floor next to my bed... so fun to step out of bed onto something so soft and warm in the morning (and in the middle of the night when I wake up to feed Jaden). 

Just a little peek at what's going to be hanging over our bed: 

 This fabric tassel bunting plus wedding vows...

I'll try to remember to show that when it's finished too.

For now, today we're getting started on painting the kitchen!!! 

Sometime I also need to publish my 2015 goals post... There is a good bit of "housey" stuff on there, which I am trying to get a jump on and it feels great! 

(To see other posts on our bedroom click here or here.) 

Let's talk about hair

I think my hair is the longest and healthiest it has ever been right now.... I kind of accidentally stumbled onto some hair care routines that I think contribute to this, and I'd love to share them with you!

1. Stop Washing it So much! :)
I wash my hair approximately 26-30 times... a year.... I know, I know, that's about how often most people wash it in a month. But yes.... I wash it about every two weeks, give or take. You probably fall into one of two categories right now... you either a.) think I am gross or b.) you want to know how you too can achieve this glorious freedom that also brings with it the gift of healthier hair. If you are in category b, keep on reading! If you are in category a, even if you think it's gross, you are probably still curious, so you should keep reading too ;)

Your body produces oil for your hair because it is actually good for it. Every time we wash our hair and strip the oils out of it we are actually depriving our hair of what it needs. The more we strip the oils, the more our body tries to compensate, the more oil is produced, and the more we think we need to wash it. If we could somehow reverse this cycle, the less oil our body will produce, the more will actually make it into our hair, the healthier our hair will be, and the less we will need to wash it. That's kind of the foundation here.

If I want to have long hair, but also have three kids, and don't want to get up at 5:00 a.m. (because, hello, with a baby still waking up in the night after 14 months, I gotta sleep when I can), and I'd like to look semi put together and don't want to leave the house with my hair wet in a ponytail any time I'm going somewhere, something's gotta give... I don't have time for long luxurious showers, blow dries, styling and then still have time to put on makeup and choose something other than sweatpants to wear. Besides being long my hair is also thick, and it takes a long time to wash and dry. So instead of washing it daily or even every other day, about two years ago I started washing it only twice a week. Then I moved to just once a week. Now I'm down to every two weeks. I doubt I will do it any less frequently than that, but this is seriously a life-changing wonder. On the days I am not washing my hair I still have time to jump in the shower with my hair in a bun or wrapped in a towel to keep it from getting wet (you could also use a shower cap), do a minimal makeup routine, and get dressed in about 15 minutes, without worrying about my hair at all. And I actually love it more than ever. My least favorite hair day is the first day or two it's been washed. It only gets better with time. On the days you are washing your hair, make sure that you comb it out with a wide tooth comb while you are still in the shower and the conditioner is still in your hair to detangle with minimal breakage.

(In the photo below it had been exactly two weeks since I washed my hair... one week of that time had been spent at the beach no less.... in other words, there was probably sand in my scalp, but my hair still looked and felt fluffy and clean)

Here are my secrets for how to go longer between washing your hair:

2. Dry Shampoo// Baby Powder
When//if you first start this journey, you might need to use this type of product more often. I usually wait til about day three to use anything. But let me back up. If you don't know about the miracle of dry shampoo, well then hang onto your coffee mugs, because your world is about to be rocked. There are lots of expensive brands you can buy, or you can do the less expensive route and use baby powder (like I do). When I feel like my hair is starting to look a bit flat or oily, I simply comb it all out with a wide tooth comb, then sprinkle a little baby powder at my roots. There are some definite tricks to doing this well. NEVER apply baby powder right where your part is, or you will look like you have gray hair or a white scalp, or both. Using your pointer finger, run your finger through your hair and part it slightly to the left or the right of your part, put baby powder on your palm, and then dust your palm over your hair. The further you get from your part then it is ok to start to sprinkle the powder directly onto your roots. Do this all around the crown of your head, then flip your head over and rub it in really well with the tips of your fingers. Flip your hair back and check to make sure it is all rubbed in, repeat if necessary.
If you have blonde hair like mine you can just use the baby powder as is. But if you have darker hair mix a little cocoa powder in to tint it darker, or if you have red hair you can mix in some cinnamon to tint it a more auburn color. If none of these tricks get it to the exact color you need, you can always buy tinted dry shampoo from somewhere like Sephora. Now I don't particularly love the scent of baby powder, but as long as I use a minimal amount, and rub it in well, I never notice the smell. I also spritz my perfume on my hair instead of just my clothes though, so that probably helps.

3. Add Oil to the tips of your hair
You can do this right after your shower, and/or you can do this on the days between washing (as long as you don't use much). My favorite is Moroccan Oil, I know it is expensive but a little goes a long way. I actually haven't had any for a long time (like at least a year), but I am going to try to get some more sometime soon. The purpose of the oil is that it protects your hair from heat damage during blow drying or curling it, and it can add a little shine on days your hair is looking dull. 

4. Curling Wand

Purchase a curling wand. I have only had mine for a few months (this is the one I have), but it is amazing, and I would love to get another one in a bigger size. The curls last so much longer, I can curl my hair once and it will last the full two weeks. The curls get softer and turn into more of waves, but I love the progression. I can even comb through them, braid my hair, wear it in a bun, and still, the curls are there when I take it down. Not only does it save time only having to curl it once, but it only subjects my hair to heat one time for a curl that really lasts. 

You can also get a looser curl by wrapping bigger sections of hair around it (like I did in the photo below) 

 Or you can get a tighter curl by wrapping smaller sections of hair, like I did for my sister's wedding. I should also note, that on my sister's wedding day it had been four days since I'd washed my hair. I still went another week and a half and these curls lasted fabulously the whole time.

5. Products I like
   Bumble & Bumble dryspun finish is a newer product that I really love, I spray it at my roots or all over for a good textured feel and to add some body.
   I'm still super simple with my hair spray and just use Garnier Fructis, but now that I have my curling wand I actually don't even use hair spray very often anymore.
   Matrix shampoo & conditioner are still my favorite. It's expensive, but a bottle lasts a very long time with the limited amount of hair washing I actually do.
  And of course, Moroccan Oil, like I mentioned before.

(Sorry for all the photos, I think I am sub-conciously trying to prove to you that my hair does not look dirty or gross!)

If you want even more tips here are a few extras:
 -using a silk pillow case is more gentle on your hair while you sleep.
 -blow drying your hair on a cooler temp helps prevent breakage.
 -I don't take vitamins specifically for my hair (or at all actually right now) but I have heard good things     about them and they do exist. If you just can't seem to grow your hair past a certain length they might be worth looking into.


I hope all this info was helpful in some way, if it seems like too much to digest my recommendation would be to buy a good brand of shampoo//conditioner and some baby powder and just try spacing out your hair washing by an extra day and see how that goes. I'm sure this isn't for everyone, but it's been a huge time saver with the unexpected blessing of healthier hair for me, so I just had to share :)

Here's to many happy hair days!

xoxo